Pinkie Pie Tries
by ShadeWalker
Long time ago, like, maybe a few years, Pinkie was really excited to meet everypony in Ponyville. Nopony was the exception, and everypony was the rule. Remembering their names was no easy task either; she never had to remember anypony's name outside of her immediate family. So what a surprise it was to her to see so many ponies in one place.
Truly, Ponyville was a large place. And it put a grin on ger face to know that she'd make everypony a friend. But to do that, she'd have to start somewhere. So she did. She walked up and down the street and introduced herself to literally everypony she could find, sometimes even if they weren't capable of speech. She'd always say, "Hi, my name is Pinkie Pie and I'm new here. It's nice to meet you. What's your name?"
But just as she finished hearing their name, she'd zip off to find the next pony. By the end of her first day, she'd heard the names of at least 30 ponies, but found that she struggled to remember all but three of them. Which posed a big problem if she wanted to befriend everypony. She spent the second day going a little slower and found she could remember 5 names out of the 15 she actually talked to.
"Not fast enough," she said to herself that night. "Must do better."
The third day she understood what she had to do. She had to develop a way of remembering everything: what the pony looked like, their name, a quirk about them and possibly their mane color. "That's a lot to remember," she admitted. "But it's gotta be written somewhere, right? Somewhere's gotta have all of this stuff in one spot. Running around is fun and all, but it's tiring..."
So she found out through the ponies she was staying with - Mr. and Mrs. Cake - that she should try the mayor's office. "You know, that's a great idea!" she beamed with a smile. "But..." she continued as her smile faded, "would whoever runs the place even let me in?"
Mrs. Cake offered Pinkie an assorted bag of scones to bring to the Mayor's office by way of convincing, after Pinkie explained to her the situation.
"I don't want just one massive party all the time. I want specialized parties. For each individual. But if I ask the pony their birthday, they'll get suspicious, so I want it to be a surprise from everypony," she went on.
Mrs. Cake gave a chuckle as she hoofed Pinkie the bag of treats and sent her on her way. While she was hopping, she passed by somepony she met a few days ago and recalled her name. When she tried to speak it through grinning mouth, she dropped the bag of scones.
"Hi Mati- oh no!" The bag hit the ground and made the saddest sound. One of the treats even rolled out and landed upside down, because of course it did.
"Oh, terribly sorry, Pinkie Pie. But hello to you too. I hope they weren't expensive."
"Nope. I got them free, but they were for the mayor lady in that building there." Pinkie gestured to the circular building just around the corner. "Maybe it's fine?" She scooped the pastry back into the bag and put it on her back. "It should be fine, right? 15 second rule?" she started to walk off carefully.
Matilda looked like she wanted to say something, but decided against it, opting to walk on.
When Pinkie got to the doors of Town hall, she found them to be unlocked. Shouldn't be a surprise to her, but she was happy for it anyway. Pinkie waked in and saw the Mayor sitting behind her desk with a mug of coffee beside a stack of papers. "Hello. What can I do for you today?"
Pinkie placed the bag from her back onto the table carefully, attempting to not hit any of the piles the Mayor had obviously tried to keep from tipping. "Hi, my name is Pinkie Pie, and I would like to see the where you hide your papers."
The mayor blinked at the filly. "I'm sorry, you what?"
"The papers. You know, with people on them."
The Mayor looked around her desk to the happy little pony before her. "Aren't you a little young to be looking at private records?" To which Pinkie shook her head. Clearly she thought it was no big deal. "Well, the papers you're looking for can't be seen by just anypony."
"But I brought you snacks..." She looked at the bag on the table. Some of the scones had seeped through the paper bag and onto the table, soiling some of the further down documents. "Oh..." she said.
The Mayor sighed and took the bag from the table. As she looked in the bag, she saw that one of them had clearly kissed the dirt at some point. "Your gift is thoughtful, but your intrusion has cost me an hour of work. Please see yourself out of my office." Pinkie blinked with a vacant grin. The Mayor sighed. "Please go home. Thank you, but go home."
Pinkie left the building and walked back to Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake was waiting for her just behind the counter. "So, how did it go?" Pinkie shook her head. "She asked me to leave. But I'm sure it's because she wanted to eat alone and think about it, right?"
Mrs. Cake shook her head. "No, dear, she's not going to let you see them."
Pinkie felt sad, so she went up to her room. Lying in bed, she thought aloud, "Scones won't do it... Maybe I can do what I did for my family?"
The next day, she went off to scavenge. Several hours later, she came to Town Hall once more. "Hello again. My name is Pinkie Pie and I would like to see where you hide the pony-faced papers."
With a grumble, the Mayor woke up and looked over at the filly. "It's too early for this..." She looked at the window shining bright daylight into the room. "Okay, maybe not too early to be awake, but still. Well, have you brought more food?"
"Yes, but not for me." She reached up into her mane and took out a stone from a garden bed nearby. "Careful, it's salty."
"You want me to eat a rock?" The Mayor looked incredulous. "Why?"
"Well, you wouldn't eat the scones, so I thought maybe you wanted something earthier."
"That's not..." the Mayor tried. Too tired to argue, she took the rock and placed it on the table on top of her smallest stack. "Thank you."
"Well, don't you wanna eat it?"
"I had breakfast already," the Mayor fibbed.
"Oh, okay then." Pinkie stood there with an expectant look. "So..."
The Mayor snapped at Pinkie. "Still no. Please leave me alone."
Pinkie trudged her way from the building all the way to Sugarcube corner. "It's not working..."she told Mrs. Cake. "I'm sure she threw away the scones yesterday, I did kinda drop one... But that rock I gave her was already on the ground."
"You wanted her to eat a rock?" Mrs. cake clarified.
Pinkie gave a chuckle. "You know, the Mayor said something similar."
Mrs. Cake imitated the chuckle. "Heh, you don't say... Well, she's not going to eat a rock, because ponies aren't supposed to eat rocks. And I know you were raised on a rock farm, but not even you did that, right?" Pinkie looked at Mrs. Cake with a flat expression. "You did? But your teeth are... well... They're perfect!"
"So I brush three times a day like a good filly. Don't worry, I'll see about doing better tomorrow." With that, she went to her room and fell asleep.
On her third day of trying, she simply walked up to the building. Past the garden bed where she found the salty rock, past the spot where she dropped the bag of scones and just went straight into the room. "Hello, my name is Pinkie Pie and-" she was cut off.
"No Pinkie, you will not see the pony-faced papers."
"Oh? I was going to apologize." The Mayor's eyebrows raised some. "I brought you what I assumed you like, and assuming is bad, Papa says. So what do you like to eat?"
The Mayor thought for a few minutes while staring at this filly. "Hay fries."
"Hay fries?"
"Hay fries. There's a food place nearby." She hoofed the filly some bits. "If you want to get me something I like, then get me hay fries from that building."
Pinkie took the bits and stuffed them into her hair. "Okay~" she replied, turning to walk out. An hour later she returned with a small bag. "Here you go. Hay fries."
The Mayor looked in the bag and saw she'd done it right. "Thank you. Now, about that rock. You took it from somepony's property, right? Please return it."
"Okay," she said with a smile. Pinkie took the rock given to her and left, coming back a few minutes later. "What else?"
"Those scones you brought me I didn't pay for. Take this money to Mrs. Cake and thank her properly." Again, she hoofed Pinkie some bits and watched as the little pony stuffed them into her mane.
Pinkie returned to Sugarcube Corner and gave the bits to Mrs. Cake. "She said she didn't pay for those scones."
"Well, the Mayor is right. But wouldn't you think that a gift the pony would like is worth it?"
"But she didn't like it."
"It dropped on the ground. And ponies aren't supposed to eat baked foods off the ground. That's what plates are for." Mrs. Cake took the bits and stored them in her register. "Now, run on back to Mayor Mare and see what else she needs."
Pinkie did exactly that, making the trip in about 15 minutes. "I'm back. My name is-"
"Pinkie Pie, I half expected you to stay gone this time," The Mayor replied. "You're still not getting those papers." Pinkie stomped her hoof and pouted. "Not without telling me why you want to see them so badly."
"Well," she started, inhaling deeply. "I'm new to Ponyville and I wanted to introduce myself to everypony and remember their names and manes and quirks and stuff but asking everypony all at once got so tiring and my brainspace is too small so I was told by Mrs. Cake that you might have the papers with all that stuff on them in here and that I should bring you a bag of scones but I dropped one and you probably saw that and that's why you threw them away and I'm so sorry about that but I wanted all that paper to see and remember everypony in Ponyville because I want to start throwing parties for each individual so they feel special and so I can make them smile like they're actually having fun!" Pinkie started to inhale again, but normally. "And just one party thrown for everyone doesn't mean as much..."
The Mayor watched in awe at this filly with impossible lung capacity as she expelled all of her reasoning with a single breath. "Well, that's a mighty fine reason. And that's all?"
Pinkie nodded. "Well, yeah. I want to throw a party for each pony, but in order to find out and remember what each one likes and doesn't like, not to mention their birthdays, it would take talking with everypony for more time than I have. So if I could just study them here, it would save a lot of time."
Mayor Mare considered it for several minutes as she watched the little pony bounce in place, eagerly anticipating the answer. "I'm sorry, but I can't."
"But I told you why and everything..."
"I know you want to, but just wanting to isn't enough..."
"What about this?" Pinkie asked, showing off her flawless pearly whites.
"I don't know what you think that does for me, but it doesn't work like that. Without a good reason, I cannot in good conscious let you peruse the residential files as you wish."
"But what i it wasn't just for me?" the Mayor looked confused. "What if it was for Sugarcube Corner and they sent me to here to see when who's birthday was and when they should prepare a certain type of food or something? But they can't know because they don't know because I don't know and I'm curious! Yes, curious. and your papers are behind a door I bet. It's a ... Hmm... a curiosity door. And you're keeping it closed. Why are you keeping the curiosity door closed?"
Again, the Mayor looked at the filly beside her desk go through a range of emotion. "Wouldn't that give an unfair advantage to the other businesses?"
"Noo..." she replied smoothly. "It's not unfair..."
"Do you know what 'advantage' is?" Pinkie shook her head. "It means that Sugarcube corner would get more money than the other businesses around town. and that's not fair, because they would know things the others don't."
Pinkie asked, "So what if I told everypony?"
"Then these files wouldn't be confidential."
"Then I promise not to tell anypony about them."
"Even Mrs. Cake?" Pinkie nodded. "You promise?"
"Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a pumice in my eye," Pinkie recited.
Mayor Mare looked shocked. "Pumice? Heavens no! Try something else... Like.. a cupcake. Yes, a cupcake will do."
Pinkie responded, "But a cupcake should go in the mouth, not the eye."
Mayor Mare chuckled. "Then say that your aim is bad." Pinkie tilted her head. "Just use cupcake instead of pumice?"
Pinkie nodded. "Stick a cupcake in my eye. Got it."
The Mayor smiled. "Good. But if you're supposed to do this for the business of Sugarcube Corner, and you've just promised to keep all of it to yourself, then what would you gain by knowing it?"
"I wanna throw them parties!" Pinkie screeched. "And good ones, like I threw for my family before I left. And, if we get enough ponies involved, we could even get other businesses to help out. Isn't there a clothes place in town that can do birthday outfits? There's gotta be a party store nearby too. And Sugarcube Corner can team with that farm over there to get food." Mayor Mare gave it another thought. "Besides, the more everypony else does, the less you gotta worry about, right?"
A sparkle must have hit the Mayor's eye, because she slowly started to smile real wide. "You know, you're right. If you want to take on all that responsibility, and keep the information to yourself as best as you can with that promise of yours, then okay. You can have a look through the files. but you're not allowed to take anything out of them. Or share the information with anyone. Not the private information anyway."
Pinkie was over the moon with how happy she looked. Mayor Mare didn't let it show, but she was smiling on the inside. Full glad to finally have somepony she can place some of the duties on, who actually wanted to do it.
Thus did Pinkie Pie come to be known as the premier Party Planner of Ponyville. She knew everypony's name, mane colors, birthdays, favorite foods and least favorite foods, even their preferred drink at the local bistro. That last one was hard work, too. Pinkie made it a point to not be seen following everypony else by hiding in trees or under bushes and around corners. Some say she has boxes to hide under scattered all around Ponyville in case of emergencies.
Truly, Ponyville was a large place. And it put a grin on ger face to know that she'd make everypony a friend. But to do that, she'd have to start somewhere. So she did. She walked up and down the street and introduced herself to literally everypony she could find, sometimes even if they weren't capable of speech. She'd always say, "Hi, my name is Pinkie Pie and I'm new here. It's nice to meet you. What's your name?"
But just as she finished hearing their name, she'd zip off to find the next pony. By the end of her first day, she'd heard the names of at least 30 ponies, but found that she struggled to remember all but three of them. Which posed a big problem if she wanted to befriend everypony. She spent the second day going a little slower and found she could remember 5 names out of the 15 she actually talked to.
"Not fast enough," she said to herself that night. "Must do better."
The third day she understood what she had to do. She had to develop a way of remembering everything: what the pony looked like, their name, a quirk about them and possibly their mane color. "That's a lot to remember," she admitted. "But it's gotta be written somewhere, right? Somewhere's gotta have all of this stuff in one spot. Running around is fun and all, but it's tiring..."
So she found out through the ponies she was staying with - Mr. and Mrs. Cake - that she should try the mayor's office. "You know, that's a great idea!" she beamed with a smile. "But..." she continued as her smile faded, "would whoever runs the place even let me in?"
Mrs. Cake offered Pinkie an assorted bag of scones to bring to the Mayor's office by way of convincing, after Pinkie explained to her the situation.
"I don't want just one massive party all the time. I want specialized parties. For each individual. But if I ask the pony their birthday, they'll get suspicious, so I want it to be a surprise from everypony," she went on.
Mrs. Cake gave a chuckle as she hoofed Pinkie the bag of treats and sent her on her way. While she was hopping, she passed by somepony she met a few days ago and recalled her name. When she tried to speak it through grinning mouth, she dropped the bag of scones.
"Hi Mati- oh no!" The bag hit the ground and made the saddest sound. One of the treats even rolled out and landed upside down, because of course it did.
"Oh, terribly sorry, Pinkie Pie. But hello to you too. I hope they weren't expensive."
"Nope. I got them free, but they were for the mayor lady in that building there." Pinkie gestured to the circular building just around the corner. "Maybe it's fine?" She scooped the pastry back into the bag and put it on her back. "It should be fine, right? 15 second rule?" she started to walk off carefully.
Matilda looked like she wanted to say something, but decided against it, opting to walk on.
When Pinkie got to the doors of Town hall, she found them to be unlocked. Shouldn't be a surprise to her, but she was happy for it anyway. Pinkie waked in and saw the Mayor sitting behind her desk with a mug of coffee beside a stack of papers. "Hello. What can I do for you today?"
Pinkie placed the bag from her back onto the table carefully, attempting to not hit any of the piles the Mayor had obviously tried to keep from tipping. "Hi, my name is Pinkie Pie, and I would like to see the where you hide your papers."
The mayor blinked at the filly. "I'm sorry, you what?"
"The papers. You know, with people on them."
The Mayor looked around her desk to the happy little pony before her. "Aren't you a little young to be looking at private records?" To which Pinkie shook her head. Clearly she thought it was no big deal. "Well, the papers you're looking for can't be seen by just anypony."
"But I brought you snacks..." She looked at the bag on the table. Some of the scones had seeped through the paper bag and onto the table, soiling some of the further down documents. "Oh..." she said.
The Mayor sighed and took the bag from the table. As she looked in the bag, she saw that one of them had clearly kissed the dirt at some point. "Your gift is thoughtful, but your intrusion has cost me an hour of work. Please see yourself out of my office." Pinkie blinked with a vacant grin. The Mayor sighed. "Please go home. Thank you, but go home."
Pinkie left the building and walked back to Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake was waiting for her just behind the counter. "So, how did it go?" Pinkie shook her head. "She asked me to leave. But I'm sure it's because she wanted to eat alone and think about it, right?"
Mrs. Cake shook her head. "No, dear, she's not going to let you see them."
Pinkie felt sad, so she went up to her room. Lying in bed, she thought aloud, "Scones won't do it... Maybe I can do what I did for my family?"
The next day, she went off to scavenge. Several hours later, she came to Town Hall once more. "Hello again. My name is Pinkie Pie and I would like to see where you hide the pony-faced papers."
With a grumble, the Mayor woke up and looked over at the filly. "It's too early for this..." She looked at the window shining bright daylight into the room. "Okay, maybe not too early to be awake, but still. Well, have you brought more food?"
"Yes, but not for me." She reached up into her mane and took out a stone from a garden bed nearby. "Careful, it's salty."
"You want me to eat a rock?" The Mayor looked incredulous. "Why?"
"Well, you wouldn't eat the scones, so I thought maybe you wanted something earthier."
"That's not..." the Mayor tried. Too tired to argue, she took the rock and placed it on the table on top of her smallest stack. "Thank you."
"Well, don't you wanna eat it?"
"I had breakfast already," the Mayor fibbed.
"Oh, okay then." Pinkie stood there with an expectant look. "So..."
The Mayor snapped at Pinkie. "Still no. Please leave me alone."
Pinkie trudged her way from the building all the way to Sugarcube corner. "It's not working..."she told Mrs. Cake. "I'm sure she threw away the scones yesterday, I did kinda drop one... But that rock I gave her was already on the ground."
"You wanted her to eat a rock?" Mrs. cake clarified.
Pinkie gave a chuckle. "You know, the Mayor said something similar."
Mrs. Cake imitated the chuckle. "Heh, you don't say... Well, she's not going to eat a rock, because ponies aren't supposed to eat rocks. And I know you were raised on a rock farm, but not even you did that, right?" Pinkie looked at Mrs. Cake with a flat expression. "You did? But your teeth are... well... They're perfect!"
"So I brush three times a day like a good filly. Don't worry, I'll see about doing better tomorrow." With that, she went to her room and fell asleep.
On her third day of trying, she simply walked up to the building. Past the garden bed where she found the salty rock, past the spot where she dropped the bag of scones and just went straight into the room. "Hello, my name is Pinkie Pie and-" she was cut off.
"No Pinkie, you will not see the pony-faced papers."
"Oh? I was going to apologize." The Mayor's eyebrows raised some. "I brought you what I assumed you like, and assuming is bad, Papa says. So what do you like to eat?"
The Mayor thought for a few minutes while staring at this filly. "Hay fries."
"Hay fries?"
"Hay fries. There's a food place nearby." She hoofed the filly some bits. "If you want to get me something I like, then get me hay fries from that building."
Pinkie took the bits and stuffed them into her hair. "Okay~" she replied, turning to walk out. An hour later she returned with a small bag. "Here you go. Hay fries."
The Mayor looked in the bag and saw she'd done it right. "Thank you. Now, about that rock. You took it from somepony's property, right? Please return it."
"Okay," she said with a smile. Pinkie took the rock given to her and left, coming back a few minutes later. "What else?"
"Those scones you brought me I didn't pay for. Take this money to Mrs. Cake and thank her properly." Again, she hoofed Pinkie some bits and watched as the little pony stuffed them into her mane.
Pinkie returned to Sugarcube Corner and gave the bits to Mrs. Cake. "She said she didn't pay for those scones."
"Well, the Mayor is right. But wouldn't you think that a gift the pony would like is worth it?"
"But she didn't like it."
"It dropped on the ground. And ponies aren't supposed to eat baked foods off the ground. That's what plates are for." Mrs. Cake took the bits and stored them in her register. "Now, run on back to Mayor Mare and see what else she needs."
Pinkie did exactly that, making the trip in about 15 minutes. "I'm back. My name is-"
"Pinkie Pie, I half expected you to stay gone this time," The Mayor replied. "You're still not getting those papers." Pinkie stomped her hoof and pouted. "Not without telling me why you want to see them so badly."
"Well," she started, inhaling deeply. "I'm new to Ponyville and I wanted to introduce myself to everypony and remember their names and manes and quirks and stuff but asking everypony all at once got so tiring and my brainspace is too small so I was told by Mrs. Cake that you might have the papers with all that stuff on them in here and that I should bring you a bag of scones but I dropped one and you probably saw that and that's why you threw them away and I'm so sorry about that but I wanted all that paper to see and remember everypony in Ponyville because I want to start throwing parties for each individual so they feel special and so I can make them smile like they're actually having fun!" Pinkie started to inhale again, but normally. "And just one party thrown for everyone doesn't mean as much..."
The Mayor watched in awe at this filly with impossible lung capacity as she expelled all of her reasoning with a single breath. "Well, that's a mighty fine reason. And that's all?"
Pinkie nodded. "Well, yeah. I want to throw a party for each pony, but in order to find out and remember what each one likes and doesn't like, not to mention their birthdays, it would take talking with everypony for more time than I have. So if I could just study them here, it would save a lot of time."
Mayor Mare considered it for several minutes as she watched the little pony bounce in place, eagerly anticipating the answer. "I'm sorry, but I can't."
"But I told you why and everything..."
"I know you want to, but just wanting to isn't enough..."
"What about this?" Pinkie asked, showing off her flawless pearly whites.
"I don't know what you think that does for me, but it doesn't work like that. Without a good reason, I cannot in good conscious let you peruse the residential files as you wish."
"But what i it wasn't just for me?" the Mayor looked confused. "What if it was for Sugarcube Corner and they sent me to here to see when who's birthday was and when they should prepare a certain type of food or something? But they can't know because they don't know because I don't know and I'm curious! Yes, curious. and your papers are behind a door I bet. It's a ... Hmm... a curiosity door. And you're keeping it closed. Why are you keeping the curiosity door closed?"
Again, the Mayor looked at the filly beside her desk go through a range of emotion. "Wouldn't that give an unfair advantage to the other businesses?"
"Noo..." she replied smoothly. "It's not unfair..."
"Do you know what 'advantage' is?" Pinkie shook her head. "It means that Sugarcube corner would get more money than the other businesses around town. and that's not fair, because they would know things the others don't."
Pinkie asked, "So what if I told everypony?"
"Then these files wouldn't be confidential."
"Then I promise not to tell anypony about them."
"Even Mrs. Cake?" Pinkie nodded. "You promise?"
"Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a pumice in my eye," Pinkie recited.
Mayor Mare looked shocked. "Pumice? Heavens no! Try something else... Like.. a cupcake. Yes, a cupcake will do."
Pinkie responded, "But a cupcake should go in the mouth, not the eye."
Mayor Mare chuckled. "Then say that your aim is bad." Pinkie tilted her head. "Just use cupcake instead of pumice?"
Pinkie nodded. "Stick a cupcake in my eye. Got it."
The Mayor smiled. "Good. But if you're supposed to do this for the business of Sugarcube Corner, and you've just promised to keep all of it to yourself, then what would you gain by knowing it?"
"I wanna throw them parties!" Pinkie screeched. "And good ones, like I threw for my family before I left. And, if we get enough ponies involved, we could even get other businesses to help out. Isn't there a clothes place in town that can do birthday outfits? There's gotta be a party store nearby too. And Sugarcube Corner can team with that farm over there to get food." Mayor Mare gave it another thought. "Besides, the more everypony else does, the less you gotta worry about, right?"
A sparkle must have hit the Mayor's eye, because she slowly started to smile real wide. "You know, you're right. If you want to take on all that responsibility, and keep the information to yourself as best as you can with that promise of yours, then okay. You can have a look through the files. but you're not allowed to take anything out of them. Or share the information with anyone. Not the private information anyway."
Pinkie was over the moon with how happy she looked. Mayor Mare didn't let it show, but she was smiling on the inside. Full glad to finally have somepony she can place some of the duties on, who actually wanted to do it.
Thus did Pinkie Pie come to be known as the premier Party Planner of Ponyville. She knew everypony's name, mane colors, birthdays, favorite foods and least favorite foods, even their preferred drink at the local bistro. That last one was hard work, too. Pinkie made it a point to not be seen following everypony else by hiding in trees or under bushes and around corners. Some say she has boxes to hide under scattered all around Ponyville in case of emergencies.